When people ask me this question, ‘is sex before marriage a sin? My response goes with a question ‘what does your conscience tell you? I do not know about other religion and so it would be unfair to speak about a religion i know nothing about. So i would speak from
The sad truth is that we are having the wrong conversation over and over again. In an attempt to justify what is believed to be common knowledge, we are pulling at any verse that has an inkling of resemblance to premarital sex. We are using these verses, devoid of their context and circumstance, in order to justify a belief that does not have much merit.
The Bible tells us to flee from sexual immorality. The word is sexual and immorality.
I think it necessary to define the words Sexual and Immorality.
The Oxford Dictionary defines sexual to mean ”connected with the physical activity of sex” and Immorality as ”behaviour that is not considered to be good or honest by most people”
- the immorality of war, sexual immorality.
Some dictionary definition defines immorality to mean wickedness.
The one true God is strongly against sexual immorality and not sex itself and whether married or single is not his concern but your intent. One can be married and still commit sexual immorality against his/her partner, Oh yes! i bet you didn’t know.
The earlier we understand the truth from within, the freer we become and less judgmental to others.
Many source the Ten Commandments which is believed to be a direct mandate from God himself as a call to wait until we are married to have sex. In particular, the seventh of these commandments.
“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”
The problem here is that adultery and premarital sex are being equated, when in reality, they are two distinctly different things.
The Ten Commandments also known as the Decalogue, are a set of biblical principles relating to ethics and worship that play a fundamental role in Judaism and Christianity. There was no mention of fornication in it.
The text of the Ten Commandments appears twice in the Hebrew Bible: at Exodus 20:2–17 and Deuteronomy 5:6–21.
My way of interpreting the Bible is not systematic, for example, as i tend to feel my way through the text. It’s not the kind of content that will draw traditionalists en masse.
An important part about reading the Bible is understanding those circumstances under which it was written and how it can be applied to today’s society, says a Christian writer Natalie Elliott. What is written about sex before marriage in the Bible comes predominantly from the book of 1 Corinthians, written by Paul who was thought by the Holy Spirit and not from My Master Jesus Christ. However, the verse has a more deeper meaning most people fail to see.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 says “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body’s a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
This last sentence says it all ‘glorify God in your body” It simply tells you to avoid the acts of sexual immorality (wickedness) against your body or against another.
Paul realizes that celibacy is a great feat for the Corinthians, so he says that each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband when it comes to sexual relations. He says this because he knows a cure to widespread sexual exploitation is necessary for the Corinthians. Paul is not saying this to everybody in the world.
You can have sex in ways that are fulfilling, fun, good and generous, or you can have sex in ways that are harmful, bad and dangerous. Marriage is not, and has never been, a way to protect against the harmful, bad and dangerous potential of sex. Most women suffer sexual immorality in their marriages. The consequences are there, same with the single.
A look at the Bible in Judah and Tamar case: Genesis 38:3-10 GOD DIDN’T KILL ONAM BECAUSE HE SLEPT WITH HIS BROTHER’S WIDOW, BUT BECAUSE OF SEXUAL IMMORALITY…SEXUAL WICKEDNESS DON AGAINST HER!
…So [Shua, the wife of Judah] conceived and bore a son, and [Judah] called his name Er. She conceived again and bore a son, and she called his name Onan. . . . Then Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD killed him. And Judah said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife and marry her, and raise up an heir to your brother.” But Onan knew that the heir would not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in to his brother’s wife, that he emitted on the ground, lest he should give an heir to his brother. And the thing which he did displeased the LORD; therefore He killed him also.
God slew Onan because the man contemptuously refused to fulfill his familial responsibility under the Old Covenant and what their culture required of him and not because he was a single guy sleeping with his late brother’s wife. Some of us today would criticize God for allowing such in the first place, but truth is, if that brother-in-law was a Bill Gate, you wouldn’t blink an eye to say ‘yes, come to me’ This duty is spelled out in Deuteronomy 25:5-10 to preserve tribal inheritance rights (verse 6). Another, happier circumstance of levirate marriage is recorded in the book of Ruth, an event that eventually produced Israel’s greatest king, David (Ruth 4:17).
While it is undeniable that glorifying God through celibacy or through your body is a way to honor God, this verse is also getting at the submissive role of women at that time in the world.
WHY GOD DID NOT SMITE TAMAR FOR SLEEPING WITH HER FATHER-IN-LAW
Lets read on same page:
12After a long time Judah’s wife, the daughter of Shua, died. When Judah had finished mourning, he and his friend Hirah the Adullamite went up to his sheepshearers at Timnah. 13When Tamar was told, “Your father-in-law is going up to Timnah to shear his sheep,” 14she removed her widow’s garments, covered her face with a veil to disguise herself, and sat at the entrance to Enaim, which is on the way to Timnah. For she saw that although Shelah had grown up, she had not been given to him as a wife.
15When Judah saw her, he thought she was a prostitute because she had covered her face. 16Not realizing that she was his daughter-in-law, he went over to her and said, “Come now, let me sleep with you.”
“What will you give me for sleeping with you?” she inquired.
17“I will send you a young goat from my flock,” read on and see how God was God using Judah to judge himself, when he wanted to kill her for getting pregnant.
Ever asked yourself why Tamar was not killed from the point where she disguised herself to look like a prostitute to the point where she slept with her father-in-law and when she took in? Where the parties married? No! The Bible never asked us to abstain from sexual pleasures but from sexual immorality. The definition of sexual immorality is as stated above.
One thing is for such, whatsoever a man sows, he reaps. If as a single guy your purpose of having sexual relations is to hurt, revenge, embarrass, use women, that is sin even if you perform such acts on your lawfully wedded wife. But when both parties indulge in it with an understanding or a contract in love, compatibility mutual understanding, it is no sin.
In conclusion, just because something is outside one’s experience doesn’t mean it’s necessarily wrong.
Untill next time… its bye for now.
